Tell the Truth but be nice about it: part 3 · May 26, 07:19 AM
Differences between the way men and women communicate:
Not only is there a difference between the volume of communication between men and women, there is also a difference in the form of communication (remember, these are generalization – specific cases may be very different).
Men can often be linear and sequential in their communications. We tend to break things down into component parts and analyze them. We go logically (at least it seems logical to us!) from A to B to C. A Man would say; “if A equals B, and B equals C, then obviously A equals C, end of discussion.” A woman might say, “yes, but B and C are not getting along and A has a hidden agenda, besides Q and C have been spending a lot of time together lately.” At that point, the man looks at the woman with a bewildered look on his face and says, “what??”
Part of the difference between male and female thinking and speaking may be explained physiologically. Before birth male and female brains are basically the same. However, when the male hormone is released into the brain of male babies, there is a chemical change in the brain.The hypothalamus is a nerve bridge between the right and left halves of the brain. The release of the male hormones dissolves the hypothalamus in male babies and decreases interaction between the two halves of the male brain. As a result many men tend to things more analytically (breaking things down and compartmentalizing them) and women often process things in a more wholistic and integrated way with both halves of the brain at the same time.
The woman looks at the issue as a whole, both logically and emotionally and flashes to what seem to be “intuitive” conclusions while the man is still taking the problem apart and working through it linearly. Some men may also find it easier to distance themselves from their emotions by thinking exclusively with their left brain.
Do these patterns hold true for your relationship?
Which one of you tends to be more intuitive? you or your partner?
Which one of you tends to be more practical?
Do you ever feel like you need a gender dictionary to understand one another?
How can you learn to appreciate the way your partner processes things?
Comment
Commenting is closed for this article.
I have to agree…I find that often i allow my emotions to cloud my perceptions and am unable to look at situations in a practical manner. My husband helps me alot to see beyond what I am feeling at the moment and to see the bigger picture and practical results, though I must say that sometimes life isn’t practical and women can help men see how their reactions and descions may effect others emotionally.
— Amanda · May 28, 07:34 AM · #
Sometimes the journey is long and winding to understanding each other and how each one looks at life. Joseph and I have a wonderful relationship now, but it has not always been so. As he mentioned in one of the blogs…in the beginning of our marriage he would tell me what he was thinking and when he was done I would just get up and walk away. It took me a long time to learn to tell him I needed to think about it and get back to him, just as it took him a long time to learn that pursuing/pushing me for answers didn’t help the process. There were also the “certain days of the month” that I was cranky. I had to learn to SAY “I need lots of grace today” and he needed to learn to give me some space. Communication is so key to our relationships…and the cool thing is that when you’ve been together 33 years like Joseph and I have been you get to reap the rewards of all those years of work you have sown into the relationship. Enjoy the journey! Debbie
— Debbie Holbrook · May 28, 04:16 PM · #